Well my blood test results came back in on Wednesday as a big fat negative. I wasn't shocked. I try to stay positive, but on the inside I'm pessimistic about the whole thing. On the deeper inside I think I get my hopes up too much because I was sincerely depressed that it was negative, and then my AF didn't show up for the next couple of days getting my hopes up all over again, just to dash them in the mud again Saturday morning. So to make myself feel better while shopping for Allie's baby shower gift, I also bought myself a sweater. A beautiful green sweater. My wonderfully sweet husband also bought me an orchid plant. So I'll brush my hopes of October under the rug and move on to November. We only have our discounted COBRA until December, so afterwards we are taking a break. Benefits are essential since I go for ultrasounds weekly for this process. I really hate to take a break, but really its not great timing anyway. So here's reasons to take a break in 2010 to help me feel better:
1. Insurance is no longer
2. Not financially stable due to Steve being laid off now for almost a year
3. Last semester of school!
4. 30th Birthday party
5. New Year's champaigne
Also Christmas this year is going to be tough. We are broke. We are struggling to keep up. Our savings is a thing of the past and its all due to this depression. Steve applies for jobs daily and there is nothing out there. We are seriously considering leaving the state after I graduate. I love my house, but it might be necessary to give it up for us to move forward.
School is crazy. I'm drowning. Steve is doing well in his classes. He has a meeting with his dean today to go over applying to the program he wants to get in. I'm hoping it goes really well. It could be an answer to some of our prayers.